2 short baby videos

I just love his giggle

This was the first time he started dancing. The little knee bounce is the best dance move. I don't remember my other kids doing it this early. I wish the video was a little longer, but when he sees the camera he has to come grab it!

Sleep, or the lack thereof

Let me start out by saying that I am one of those people who needs a lot of good solid sleep.  I need about 9 hours.  10 is nice.  No joke.  I have always slept a lot.  Ask my mom about my napping schedule when I was a toddler (2 loooong naps a day).
When I first had Lulu, it was so hard for me to be up with her multiple times a night.  I would stress out that I was awake when it was dark outside, knowing that I would be tired the next day.  I literally would get anxiety whenever it was dusk because I knew I wasn't going to get a full night's sleep.  Again.
Well, I have come to accept that part of being a mom is being tired. Well, being a mom with young children means being sleepy.  I am hoping as my children get older they will start sleeping better and maybe we can all get some better sleep!  I'm optimistic that this hope may become a reality because Lulu has done so much better the last 6 months or so. And I have to tell you, the sticker/color chart works wonders for her!  If she doesn't wake me up in the night then she gets to put a sticker on her chart.  Or in the case of the Princess Tiana picture, she gets to color a few sections of the picture.  When it's all full she gets to choose a really cool prize.  Check it out, Tiana is all colored in!  That means she gets to choose any movie from Redbox that she wants.  I hope Ollie is ready for Barbie something or other.  One time she worked up to a Polly Pocket. Another time she chose Italian Ice.
And so, she has become our best sleeper!  She goes down without a fuss.  She often goes to the bathroom in the night, but she does it all on her own.  I'm so proud.
Now Hammer, he is a little harder to get down. Ollie spends a good 15 minutes with him each night until he is asleep.  Once he is asleep though he often sleeps through the night.  Unless T is waking him up.
Which has been happening lately.  Please tell me there's a reason that T is crying at 12:30 and 2:30 every night.  Sometimes at 4:30 too.  All he wants is a little snuggle and he's back asleep, but it's disturbing Hammer, and me, and Ollie.  It's getting old.  Maybe it's because he's getting teeth?  I hope there is reason to his madness.
The other night T actually slept the entire night!  And wouldn't you know it?  Lulu and Hammer were both up twice.  
Every morning when T gets up, somewhere between 5:30 and 7, I am so tired.  I have to drag myself out of bed.  It sure warms my heart though to see his cute little face and hold him as he hugs me so tightly.  He is just such a sweet heart.
Sometimes it's hard to get going in the mornings when I am so tired.
Sometimes it's hard to be patient when I'm sleepy.
Sometimes it's hard  to get housework done when my energy is low.
Sometimes I don't feel like I'm doing as much as I can with my kids when I didn't get enough sleep.
But amazingly, most days I do get a lot done!  I guess I have figured out how to live on inadequate (for me) sleep.  I don't get anxiety as the day closes.  I know that I will be awakened in the night and that I will probably be tired, but that it's ok!  I can still function happily. And I know that it's all worth it.  I wouldn't trade this for all the sleep in the world.
Most days, sometimes not until lunch time, I find that patience and tenderness. My energy and optimism kicks in too.  I'm not sure where I find it, but there it is!  It must be a tender mercy for just getting up and really trying.  I find time to snuggle.  And run on the treadmill.  And play outside. And cut little fingernails.  And plan the menu.  And plan play-dates.  And work on decorating the house.
And sometimes I even get the floor mopped.

Dear 1 year old T

Dear T,

We cut all your red curls off the day after you turned one.  It made me a little sad because they were so beautiful.  Everywhere I went people would comment on the color of your hair, and now that it's short it isn't as noticeable.  I do notice your beautiful eyes more now though.  You are so handsome.  Cutting your hair was a poignant reminder that you aren't my little baby anymore. You are turning into a little boy.  Another sure sign you are growing up is that you don't nurse anymore.

I nursed you a month longer than I nursed your siblings, and still it was over too quickly.  How I enjoyed our little alone time, just you and me.  You would stretch your little hand up to my face and rub my nose while you ate and slowly fell asleep.  Sometimes I would read while you nursed. Other times I would watch the world outside your window. I always lovingly memorized every feature of your perfect little face.  Sure it was hard to not be able to go anywhere by myself for more than an hour or two at a time, but the sacrifice was worth it.

I weaned you just two weeks after we moved into our new house.  The feelings of moving and of weaning were surprisingly similar!  This sadness weighed on my heart.  I cherished every bit of your babyhood and it was hard to realize that it was gone now.  And yet, it was also exciting to move on to a new chapter. I have loved watching you grow and learn new things.

You are so smart.  At 1 year old you can make doggy sounds and feed yourself and you talk all day long.  Granted most of it is nonsense, but you are trying out all sorts of combinations of sounds.  You do call Daddy "Dada."  You already try to make us laugh and make yourself laugh too.  And you are a tease!  You know that Dad hates it when you grind your teeth, so you do it when he is around!  You can't walk yet, but you love to stand up everywhere and get into every cupboard.  You love to play in the toilet water, which is so disgusting and dangerous.  Don't worry, the bathroom doors have stayed closed tight the two weeks or so since you discovered this new attraction.

You are very observant. When we went to the zoo a few days ago you pointed out all of the animals, even the ones that were blending into their environment.  I was impressed!  You have a great love for animals that is already so obvious.  You love your brother and sister too, but get jealous when mom or dad offer too much attention to one of them.  Just this morning you were jealous when Dad kissed me goodbye.  You gave him a look that said, "Hey, she's mine!"

At 1 year old you are still such a happy boy You are always laughing and smiling and so easy-going.  But you do get frustrated easily, especially when you're tired.  You hit your head on anything that's around: the floor, the walls,a toy.  You always have a bruise on your forehead. And you still nap once or twice a day, so that makes for lots of head-bonking.  I hope this doesn't last too long since I hate to see you get hurt.

You love to be outside, especially on a walk in your new wagon from Grammie.  You also love to play in the dirt and try to eat rocks.  You love tubby time and even put your whole face in sometimes!  I can tell you have great rhythm because you already dance by bouncing to the beat.  It's so cute!

You want me to hold you a lot, but you are also so great at playing on your own.  You are a great eater, and you'd rather eat real food than baby food.  You think you can eat anything, and you usually do!  You just crunch away with your front teeth.  We were surprised how much you loved broccoli.  You make a huge mess when you eat.  When you are finished you clear off your highchair tray with your chubby little hands by pushing all the food right onto the floor. You love milk, and especially love it when it's time for bed and I snuggle up with you and a bottle.  I love it too.  It made weaning you easier since I still get my snuggle time.  How I love snuggling with you and kissing your soft hair as you fall asleep.

It's amazing that any kids make it into adulthood.  Or even to 3 years old.  You have choked on food a few times and that always scares me so much!  A few times I have walked in when you were crying in your bed to find a blanket on your head.  Talk about a heart attack!  This is kind of embarrassing to admit because I don't want to look like a delinquent mom, but one time, before you could crawl, Dad was camping with the scouts and I was home alone with my 3 kids.  I left you on the floor in my room while I put the older kids to bed. After unsuccessfully getting Hammer to sleep I had a feeling that I should check on you when I thought I heard you crying.  I assumed you just wanted to be picked up and loved but I checked anyway.  I opened the door to my room and through the blinding light I could see that you had somehow moved and there was something wrapped around your head.  In a blind panic I raced over and pulled a bag off of your head!  I knew you were ok and breathing because you were crying, but what if I had stayed in the kids' room just another minute longer? I thanked God with all my heart that night that He let you stay here with us.  I still thank Him every single day that you and your siblings are here and that I have the privilege of raising you.

T, one of my favorite things about you is that you don't care that I kiss your little face all day long.  You fill my days with love and purpose.  You are the perfect fit in our family and we all love you so much little man.

Love, Mom

Just a million pictures of a 1st birthday party

The cake: A Dog Party!

The guests:

Plus my parents who were watching from Mexico via Instant Messenger.

Singing Happy Birthday:

Let's eat!

Opening presents:

And dinner after the party:

Isn't it great to be 1?

Beautiful Baby Girl

My beautiful baby girl graduated from preschool at the end of May.
When I look at these pictures I actually see a beautiful young girl, not a baby.  But she's still my baby, and always will be.

We went outside before we left for graduation to take some pictures of her in her cute new dress. 

Grammie came down to go with us to her little program.  It was cute.
Here's her whole class.  Yep, just 6 little girls were in the afternoon class.

They sang us some songs

then each came up and told us a little about themselves.  They were all kind of shy and nervous, which was not how they were during the songs!  It was funny though because all they had to say was their name, their birth date, and their favorite color.  Then their teacher surprised them each with a binder she had put together full of pictures and little memories from the year.

Here is the cute classroom

and here she is with her teacher.  Lulu loved her teacher, Ms Jennifer.  She WAS a great teacher.

Lulu misses preschool already.  She loves to look at her binder and reminisce. But she is so looking forward to being "big" and going to Kindergarten soon. 
Congratulations on graduating Lucy! 
You have learned so much and you are so ready for Kinder.  You will do great there because you are very smart.  And social.
I love you Baby Girl.

May edition

Life lately, according to my phone:

Our pretty new kitchen.

The Target kids' tools I bought for my display ladder.

This is the horse we used to drive by 4 times a day on the way to and from Lulu's preschool. She thought the two horses in the pen were in love because their heads were together. Well, check it out.  On this day we saw a baby horse nursing in the pen!  Maybe Lulu was right.  They WERE in love!

This makes me laugh. Lulu made her dinner into a face.

Lulu reading on our window seat.

Celebrating Ollie's birthday at a dinner with my parents and sister and brother in law.  Happy Birthday Hubby!

The card that Lulu's new friend across the street brought over for her.  It's a picture of Lulu with her long hair and Holli with her short hair.

I like this picture because it shows Hammer holding a balloon from a birthday party for our old neighbor Jasmine who turned 3.  It shows Hammer playing his favorite song "BOOM heaven is a place on earth." It shows Lulu's bed is not in her room, she was sleeping in Hammer's bunk bed again because Baby was being weaned and needed his own room. It shows Lulu playing her guitar. It shows Baby standing.  And it shows Hammer's elmo on the floor that he was still carting around everywhere.

Happy Baby in his swing.

Happy Hammer with his basketball. Yes, that's a happy face. He's trying to be funny probably.

The kids helping Daddy plant the new plants we bought for the front yard.

We drove by the pretty Brigham City temple!

Hammer found one of his favorite things: Dandelions.  He found it in his cousin's yard at Uncle John's birthday party.

The solar eclipse as seen through our special glasses!  It was really cool. See the moon creeping in on the bottom right?

Ollie paints Lulu's wall 

Baby loves to stand here and play in the dirt where my poor herbs are planted

My grandma took my kids and my cousin to Jungle Jim's.  They had a great time.  Lulu even made a new friend on one ride.  They came off the ride holding hands and wouldn't let go.  They went on a bunch of rides together.  So funny and cute.  Plus they were matching!

Lulu's favorite ride.  Hammer's nightmare ride.  He cried the entire time.  It was really fast!

Lulu earned 10 stickers on her "I won't wake up mom or dad during the night" chart.  She chose Italian Ice for her treat.  Love it!