The other side

I feel lately that I have a lot of things to be grateful for.  I know.  It's not even Thanksgiving season yet!  But really, I feel that the Lord has shown some tender mercies for my family recently.  Here are some examples:

My mom found out she had cancer in the summer= Not so good.
Tender Mercy= It was discovered when she was still at a stage 0 and so she was able to have it all removed.  She just finished a comparatively easy radiation treatment about 2 weeks ago.

The stomach flu hit our house= Nightmare.
Tender Mercy= Ollie and I and the Baby didn't get it!  I don't know how that happened, but I am so grateful.  I don't know how I would have been able to take care of and nurse Baby.  Also, it was only about a 6 hour ordeal for both Lulu and Hammer and they bounced back so quickly.

Summer is over = The sun is going to bed so much earlier = Minor depression.
Tender Mercy= The weather has been so incredibly warm for October.  I am so happy that I got to wear shorts and short sleeves for the entire month almost.  That is amazing.  And because of that, we were able to still get outside and enjoy the sun all month!  I am now ready for the cold because I know the Holiday season is here.  I'm ok with a cold Halloween and Thanksgiving and Christmas.  New Year's and Valentine's Day too.

Every year when the leaves change color I am amazed by their beauty.  Every year.  Look at this tree in my front yard. 

I feel that this is the Lord showing his tender mercy to all of us, every single year. Most people I know get a little depressed when Fall sets in and we miss the sun.  Let's face it, as humans we just need it. And not just to sustain life, but for our mental health as well.  To help us feel a little better and deal with the change, the world turns into a colorful masterpiece.  It's so beautiful and it makes me happy just to look out my window.

I also feel that celebrating Christmas in December, although not historically accurate, is a tender mercy too.  It brings such a joy into what otherwise would be a very dreadful month.  It is the most wonderful time of the year, even though the red and yellow leaves have all fallen and the sun is at it's shortest daily manifestation. 

So no matter what I'm going through I try to see the positive side of the experience.  It chases away the depressing feelings and helps me to focus on being grateful for what I have. It helps me realize that the Lord is aware of my struggles, even if they are small compared to others'.  Although He can't take always take them away, He shows that he is ever mindful of us and merciful.

A Whole Bunch of Weekend Pictures

Friday we checked out a new trail by our house with our Besties.  It was such perfect weather and the trail was beautiful.  My friend has a 3 year old girl and a 2 year old boy.  Luckily the kids love to play together because I love to hang out with their mom. A lot.
Here are the 4 kids running ahead of us:

Lulu and K:

The 4 kids:

Every time we passed a grasshopper the kids got down on their bellies to investigate.  The hoppers must have been maimed from passing bikes because they did not try to get away from the kids at all:

See, this is my neighborhood:

I like these weeds for some reason.  I think they are such a cool design:

Saturday Lulu had her last soccer game until Spring.  Again, it was incredibly warm.  Here is her cute little team:

Hammer always enjoys playing on the toys with Daddy while Lulu practices, then comes back to watch Lulu tear up the field:

Grammie came to watch the last game and then took us out to lunch. After lunch we went down to say bye to my Dad as he was soon leaving for Mexico.  We took the kids to the park.  Look, we are in shorts in mid October.  I love it.  And I love seeing my kids hold hands.  It's still cute:

Grandpa loves his grandbabies.  Mucho.  Here he is with his tocayo:

And here are the grandparents with the 3 kids:

Hammer's cheesy smiles are just cracking me up.  He found this tennis ball at Great Grandma's house and kept trying to play with it inside.  That wasn't the best idea.  I told him it was an outside ball, so he was excited Great Grandma let him take it to the park:

If you look closely you can see Lulu screaming.  Probably screaming with sheer joy she would say:

Hammer loves the slides now. He's so brave. He goes down all by himself. Here he is about to go down:

The mountains were so beautiful this weekend. Wow.  I love the colors:

Sunday Lulu had her first primary program and I took zero pictures of her.  You will have to imagine your own picture here.  She had a purple princess-y dress, white tights, and silver shoes.  We put curlers in her hair the night before so she looked akin to Shirley Temple when she gave her part "Prophets tell me I can pray."  She sang really enthusiastically and both grandmas were able to come and watch. We were all pretty proud of her.  She's such a cutie.  Not shy at all, and so very friendly.
So, we had a fun busy weekend.

Fall Makes Me Reminisce

Every year when the days are still nice but the evenings turn cool, around the end of September and early October, I remember a little town called Ephraim.  Especially if the nights are clear and crisp and I can see the stars above me.  It's automatic, like the way a smell reminds you of a very specific memory.  I have such a fondness in my heart for my first two years of college in Ephraim.  So fond, in fact that I get this strange almost homesick feeling for those times.  That makes me feel a little guilty.  What does it mean?  Am I not enjoying life to the fullest now?  Do I really wish I could live those days over?  Was I happier then than I am now? 
And so after I mull over their deliciousness for a few moments, I always push the memories back into my subconscious so I don't have to answer those questions. 
Until this year.
I decided I wanted to come to terms with this issue I have.
Ok, so Ephraim life was amazing.  Every singe day I laughed so hard that I cried. It was like one giant sleepover for 2 whole years with my best friends.  It was the time when I was really able to come out of my shell and be the person I felt inside.  It was a time of learning, both spiritually and vocationally. It was a time when boys actually talked to me and paid attention to me.  It was the time of my first love.  It was when I first made ALL of my own choices, whether they were great or not.
It was so liberating.
And it was so care-free.  No job.  No bills to pay, except for food and gas.  Only homework and a social life to worry about.
And it was so fun.
Was I happier then than I am now? No.  Would I relive that time again?  No.  I can honestly say I wouldn't want to. I have progressed and matured in the intervening years so much that going back and reliving those days would not be the same. I have no desire to still live that same way right now either.
Do I laugh so hard I cry every day?  No.  But I do laugh every day.  I feel real joy.  Is life one big party?  No, there is work and responsibility and frustrations, but a whole lot of fun too.  There is still lots of learning, and more love than I could have imagined.
Life right now is so rewarding.   There is nothing that can compare to the satisfaction I feel today in being a wife and a mother.  Rewarding and satisfying and joyful and overflowing love. I wouldn't give this up for anything.
Actually reflecting on this and writing it down has made that kind of longing for Ephraim feeling leave.  Now I'm just left with warm memories and a sense of peace for where I am in life right now.  And I don't have to compare the two times any more or try to decide which one is better.  That's just silly.  They are just different seasons of my life.
Life is full of seasons.  This season will some day pass too and years down the road something will cause me to reminisce on the days when I had babies at home, and I will sigh and maybe even feel a little homesick for this time too.  And that will be ok because I will be happy with the new season that I am in.

Some pictures of my happy Ephraim memories:

 

Evidence

Last weekend I was home alone with my babies, except for Friday night and Saturday when my parents came to play. That was fun. Ollie went on the Elk Hunt this year with some friends. It was his first time really hunting and he was pretty excited. They left Friday morning and came home Monday afternoon. Unfortunately Ollie came home empty handed, but he says he still had fun. Even after he lost his voice in the wintery mountains. While he was gone, we tried to keep busy at home. Sunday it had warmed up enough that I took the kids out on a walk to discover evidences of Fall. This is some of what we found:                             1. Baby bundled up in (and trying to eat) his bear outfit to keep warm. That's a sure sign it isn't summer anymore
2. Look! Snow on the mountains!
3. Hammer wearing his jacket, and walking the whole time! He likes to push Lulu's little stroller to hold his prized collections he picks up on the way
4. See what we picked up
5. Closer look, it's acorns!
6. We tried to find sunflowers. I don't think these are sunflowers, but they were close enough. They are fall flowers too
7. Hammer LOVES dandelions, another sign that the hot summer days are over.

My Little Giant

Baby turned 4 months old this past weekend.  He is still just as sweet as ever.  I can't believe he's such a good baby.  I feel so lucky!  I could just kiss his chubby cheeks all day.  Check out his adorable little mouth and beautiful eyes.  Oh, and his perfect nose!
And his giggle, I can't get enough of it.  My goal every day is to make him laugh as much as possible.  Lulu has the same goal.  I love it when Baby smiles or giggles or coos at Lulu and Hammer.
Then there are his wrinkles, and his tiny toes, his chubby thighs, and his ticklish spots, and the list goes on.  Can you tell I'm in love with him?
I took him in for his check up yesterday and he is still a very big boy.  He weighed in at 16 pounds 11 ounces, putting him at the 85th percentile in weight.  And his height was at the 98th percentile!  No wonder this boy is always hungry. He's a little giant.  And no wonder I'm always hungry too!  I am his only food source still.
Which brings me to the only complaint I have about him. He is still kind of a hard nurser.  He has turned into a biter now too, so let's hope for both of our sake's that he doesn't get teeth for a while.  That will be too painful for me if he keeps it up, and weening will ensue.  But if that's my only complaint so far, I'll take it.
Oh, and did I mention he only poops like every 5 days?  Sorry if that's TMI, but seriously.  Angel Baby.
Keep being such a sweetheart Baby.  We sure love ya.

Conference Weekend

Even though I am not a big fan of Fall, I do like Conference weekend.
I love hearing the Prophet and the other Apostles, although I missed quite a bit of it this year with Lulu's soccer game and other distractions.  It's still nice to hear it though and to be spiritually fed for 2 days in a row.
Saturday we had our traditional homemade cinnamon rolls just before Conference started in the morning, and set up the Conference Tent.
Between conference sessions on Saturday, Ollie raided the garden.  Check out how many peppers we got this year:

(melons too)

During the second session on Saturday we went through our 72 hour backpacks and took out food that needs to be replaced.  We do that every six months too, and Lulu was really excited to help this time.  She loves to see what goodies she gets to eat.
Then while Ollie was away for the evening session, I took the kids to the park.  That is another tradition, weather permitting.  It was just the perfect evening for the park, and we weren't the only ones who had that idea.
Sunday we took a drive to see the Fall leaves up the canyon.  Every year I want to do this and we just never seem to make it.  So this year we drove up to a cute little valley just East of Ogden.  This is a view of Pineview Reservoir up there, as seen from our van.  That drive kind of made me wish we lived there.  Not gonna lie:

The leaves were so pretty once you got high enough:

We then continued on to Ollie's mom's house for dinner between the Sunday sessions.  Delicious.  And fun times with the cousins.
When we got home after the last session it was STILL nice, so the kids were able to play outside before bath time:

All in all it was a beautiful productive weekend full of traditions.  I loved it.

Lulu's Latest

These are Lulu's latest pictures that she took a few afternoons ago. Sometimes she needs a little advice on what to take a picture of, but she took them all by herself. I was pretty impressed, considering the camera she uses and that she's 4.